Surrender Again

May 17, 2012

My mind cannot focus today Lord.  I call upon your name constantly within my spirit.   I need you to help me navigate the waters ahead.  Anxiety creeps up on me when I am not watchful.  Worry threatens my peace in You.  Help!!   Where can I turn from here but to You!  Have I surrendered it all to You?  Just when I think I have, I find myself thinking about it again and trying to figure out what to do on my own.  I’m breathing in Your peace and breathing out the negativity and toxins.  Slow Breaths….deep breaths.  I visualize Your presence filling me in the midst of my fearful places.”

I can identify with David right now as He sang his praises to God in the midst of his enemy pursuing him and the fear he was fighting.  As a Mom of grown children I realize we can’t navigate their life for them.  They must find their way with God’s help and my support.  Not the other way around.  Yet when you see them in so much pain and so many changes it is as if it is happening to you, yet you can do nothing to help in the natural and prayer becomes your constant companion.  Outside of my counsel to them, when warranted, I must constantly surrender them to Him.  We think when they are little the bond and covering and protection from you will last forever.  Are we ever prepared for that empty feeling that accompanies our children leaving home and making it on their own, making their own decisions?  And when we see them suffering from their own decisions and we can’t help were we prepared for the agony of not being able to deliver them?

I have just come out of a great victory in God where He miraculously saved our home for us. (Read “A Sure Dwelling Place” in my blog archives.)  In my personal life I see Jesus everywhere.  But how can I rejoice in my victories when I see my grown child suffering so? I want them to be blessed as well. Does anyone identify with this feeling?  Our kids are an extension of us.  When it is time to let go we must do it again and again.

I found my answer in my relationship with Jesus.  I went for a walk with Him this morning and just talked to Him about this turmoil I feel.   I held nothing back.  I came to see that the secret is in the absolute surrender to Him, again and again.  This is what he said to me:

“Dixie, your love for your children is just a mirror of my love for them.  You have prayed for them since before they were born.  Do you think my word returns to me without accomplishing the very thing you prayed for?  My word is eternal.  I am still working as I did from the beginning.   Where you can see no way, I see clearly.  My plan is to grow them up just as that is my plan with you.  You hold on so tightly because of so much pain in your past.  But forget the former things.  I have.  I have a plan and you will see it come to past.   As you let go I pick it up.  Every time you grab on again, let go again.  I will pick it up.  Don’t get in my way.  Trust me.  My peace and patience I give to you, my daughter.”

For those of you who have adult kids you are praying for surrender them to Him.  He does a much better job than we ever could.  I picture them in my cupped hands.  He stands behind me and puts Him arms around me and cups His hands under mine.   I let go of them and drop them in His hands.  He lovingly embraces them within His arms and walks away and His peace fills me once again.  We cannot enable them to depend on us to deliver them or they would never develop absolute dependency on Him.   Letting go………

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13 thoughts on “Surrender Again

  1. thanks Dixie for sharing your heart and this message. This week I chose the topic “Let go and let God” for my special care group relating to family members: our children or grandchildren, adult children and/or spouses, extended loved ones…
    God continues to teach me the life-long process of releasing my needs, surrendering my will, and letting go of my loved ones; I can fully TRUST JESUS for He is my sovereign loving SAVIOR and LORD of my life. We understand how hard it is, when those we love suffer because we share in their suffering either indirectly or directly. I am learning anew to “surrender all to Jesus.” There is peace, comfort, hope and joy in the Lord. He promises to be with us always, through all the troubles and tribulation and even unto the end of this world. So together we go forward one step, moment by moment…

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  2. Right on time! Son facing giants in his mind and I feel as though I will die though I know better! Hold him up in prayer with me! He is saved but being tortured in mind.

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      • This is nothing short of a miracle! Last nights events were me trying to help from a point of absolute total paralyzingly fear making things only worse! At the climax I wondered where could God be in the situation. This morning things were repaired but I still could not see where I had gone wrong! Then I opened FB up in total exasperation never expecting to find His words speaking such truth and love to me reminding me to just be supportive and give him to God each and every moment in faith that He knows what he is doing! Fear had gripped me so ! I was angry with myself for not knowing how to help and feeling powerless! Praise God!!!!!!!

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      • Wow Sharron…now I know why I was prompted to write this now. It really felt too intimate to me and fresh to share right now…but I felt like I needed to be honest with what Jesus was saying this morning regarding my kid, our kids…..and that someone out there needed the encouragement as well….Isn’t the way He works great? Bless you as you navigate these waters my friend!!

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  3. Letting go and surrendering all to God seems like a constant whirling circle of hold and release and as I reflect on that not-so-merry-go-round of human emotion I simply ask why. Ok I’m human, it’s our imperfect nature, weakness of faith and all that. I get it.
    But as I grow older my hindsight is becoming more focused, and clear and I realize that having a relationship with Christ is not good enough. It’s run of the mill, average, and everyday normal in the body of Christ. Why should I settle for less? Even the devil has a relationship with Christ and in this context that is simply unacceptable.
    I have discovered that a life in Christ is not simply a matter of semantics but a mind set. If we settle for the mediocre, a relationship with Christ, then we are settling for the stale doldrums of existence in a world where the enemy has his way more often than we realize. But what if I change the way I think ? What if I start living like a child of God as my child is a child of the life God has given me and them, together as one?
    This is a life in Christ and this realization allows the roller coaster to come to a stop where I get off and sure-footedly begin the truly steady walk, not merely in His presence, but in the life He has given me without fear and without the need to constantly
    analyze my every challenge. It’s difficult to change a mindset so deeply engrained by years and years of trials, tribulations, victories, and blessings. I tend to substantiate my relationship with the Lord by constantly re-hashing the same scenarios over and over again and this action makes me feel like I’m really doing something because I’m just so “spiritual”. After all doesn’t God tell us to cast all our worries upon Him? Yep.
    Yet somehow the acknowledgement that God has given us a life and not just a relationship, unquestioned and fully accepted seems at times elusive but it doesn’t have to be if I truly want it to be. And that’s the conundrum.

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  4. Wow Rick!!! Wonderful insights to our walk in true Kingdom living. Yes, we must reprogram our minds to get out of our old ways of thinking. Renewing our minds is a constant, daily walk, but so worth it. There has to be more that what we have walked in in the past, right? I, for one, am determined to press forward into the revelation freedom we were always meant to walk in. A daily spiritual walk encompassed by His presence every minute, even when we feel very human. He is interested and has much to say about every tiny detail of our lives. Our walk was never meant to just stop at salvation; that was only the beginning. Jesus came to not only provide the way to eternity but to show us how we were really meant to live in the here and now!!! Thanks for responding….

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  5. You wrote another gem, and so doggone apt to my current situation. I’ve released yet again and am living in God’s love for me and my children and family. It’s thrilling, and a really happy life, despite the outside circumstances.

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    • Praise Him Susan!! I am convinced our lives consist of daily surrender of all of our concerns to Him. Praying together for our wonderful kids!!!! ♥♥

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  6. Thank you for this Dixie. This is something I do nearly every day–turn my family and my feelings over to Him. I don’t have to feel (have the emotions in place) like doing it but when I do it the emotions change. The longer I live the more I know that however I behave towards those I love they behave the same way toward me. God has given me a unique reminder on days when I don’t feel so in tune with Him. I have atypical migraine–no headache but a myriad of other weird symptoms. I have a noise in my head. It used to sound like an old fashioned cash register but recently it is hymns. When they are dragging and slow like a dirge I know I am not where I am supposed to be. As I pray and work it through they sound more like they are supposed to sound and finally disappear along with the other symptoms. I am convinced this is a God given way to tell me to pay attention.

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