7 Behaviors of a Persistently Unhappy Person….It is a Choice

Unhappy-PersonBeing a Life Purpose Coach has opened my eyes to so many things in my own life. One of those things I have learned is that I am responsible for my own happiness-no one else is responsible for me.  So, I often coach about happiness being a choice and the one responsible for your happiness is YOU! 

Six years of coaching has shown me there are some definite characteristics of a chronically unhappy person.  It may take a few sessions but invariably it becomes clear to me the areas we need to work on.

Mostly as we grow spiritually and mentally we tend to bounce back and forth between happiness and unhappiness in the course of even one day.  But there are those who are blinded to the fact that they can change the course of their life by allowing God to show them how to renew their minds and what tools to use to do that.

mind-clutterI’ve learned there are certain traits and habits chronically unhappy people seem to have mastered. We all have bad days, even weeks when we fall down in all seven areas. 

But, the difference between a happy and unhappy life is how often and how long we stay there.

And I must say a few things about the difference in happiness and the Joy that comes from Jesus.

Happiness is fleeting.  It can claim your full attention for the ten seconds it takes to sing a fun song.  Or it can stream through your being for weeks on end.  But happiness can’t hold the same space as sadness, or anger, or the range of so-called “negative” emotions for very long.  This is why it’s transitory and subject to your choices.

praying-womanJoy is the foundation of your Soul (mind, will, and emotions), and since your Soul can never be annihilated, your access to joy never vanishes. Because joy is so foundational to your true being, every other state or emotion can rest on top of joy, it can accommodate everything.

This means that it’s possible to grieve with your whole heart, and still sense your joy.  You can feel rage, suffering, and pain and still be aware of joy waiting patiently for you to return, and you take deep comfort in that.

It has never failed that when I have been through the most heart-breaking passages of my life — betrayal, financial hardship, divorce, dreams dashed, deep loss — the pain brought me to the floor of my spiritual being and what did I find there?  His presence….and then His joy in the midst of my sorrow.

♥  Happiness.  Has to be a choice you make.  You are the only one responsible for your happiness.

♥  Joy.  It’s the love from His character that lasts no matter what.  You walk into it by faith and He gives freely.

So, with that said here are 7 traits of chronically unhappy people that I have noted.

1. Your core belief is that life is hard all the time.  You think there is something wrong with you, as opposed to others, that makes your life hard.

Happy people know life can be hard and tend to bounce through hard times with an attitude of curiosity versus victimization.  They know who they are in Christ and realize that though life may be hard they take responsibility for their thought lives and focus on moving forward to better times.  Perseverance towards problem-solving versus complaining over circumstances is a symptom of a happy person.  Unhappy people see themselves as victims of life and stay stuck in the “look what happened to me” attitude versus finding a way through and out the other side.  They tend to think God is a respecter of people and has ruled them out when it comes to happiness.

2. You believe most people can’t be trusted, thus limiting your vulnerability to those who can truly help you see truth.

Healthy discernment is important, but most happy people are willing to trust.  They believe in the good in people, versus assuming everyone is out to get them.  They are generally open and friendly towards people they meet, and happy people foster a sense of community around themselves and meet new people with an open heart.
walk in the lightUnhappy people are distrustful of most people they meet and assume that strangers can’t be trusted.  Unfortunately this behavior slowly starts to close the door on any connection and thwarts all chances of meeting new friends.

3. You concentrate on what’s wrong in this world versus what’s right.

There’s plenty wrong with this world and all you have to do is watch the nightly news to open the door to fear, yet unhappy people turn a blind eye to what’s actually right in this world and instead focus on what’s wrong.  It can and is addictive to fill your mind with the negative, day in and day out.

They are usually the ones complaining and responding to any positive attributes of our world with “yeah but”.

loveHappy people are aware of global issues, but balance their concern with also seeing what’s right.  They allow their focus to be on Him rather than what they see in the world.  Or as the word of God tells us:  Philippians 4: 6-9 says this:

Don’t fret or worry.  Instead of worrying, pray.  Let petitions and praises shape your worries into prayers, letting God know your concerns.  Before you know it, a sense of God’s wholeness, everything coming together for good, will come and settle you down.  It’s wonderful what happens when Christ displaces worry at the center of your life.

Summing it all up, friends, I’d say you’ll do best by filling your minds and meditating on things true, noble, reputable, authentic, compelling, gracious—the best, not the worst; the beautiful, not the ugly; things to praise, not things to curse.  Put into practice what you learned from me, what you heard and saw and realized.  Do that, and God, who makes everything work together, will work you into his most excellent harmonies.”

However, unhappy people tend to close one eye towards anything good in this world in fear they might be distracted from what’s wrong.  Happy people keep it in perspective.  They know our world has problems and they also keep an eye on what’s right.

4. You compare yourself to others and harbor jealousy.choices

Unhappy people believe someone else’s good fortune steals from their own.  They believe there’s not enough goodness to go around and constantly compare yours against theirs.  This leads to jealousy and resentment.

Happy people know that their good luck and circumstance are merely signs of what they too can aspire to achieve.  Happy people believe they carry a unique blueprint that can’t be duplicated or stolen from –which is true…we were created unique and special and God has a plan for each of our lives.  They believe in unlimited possibilities and don’t get bogged down by thinking one person’s good fortune limits their possible outcome in life.

5. You strive to control your life.

There’s a difference between control and striving to achieve our goals. Happy people take steps daily to achieve their goals, but realize in the end, there’s very little control over sufferings and trials that may come…it is those trials however, that perfect our faith and draw us closer to Him.

happinessUnhappy people tend to micromanage their lives in effort to control all outcomes and fall apart in dramatic display when life throws a wrench in their plan.  Happy people can be just as focused, yet still have the ability to go with the flow and not melt down when life delivers a curve-ball.

The key here is to be goal-oriented and focused, but allow room for growth when the best laid plans go awry- because they will sometimes. Going with the flow is what happy people have as plan B.

 6. You consider your future with worry and fear.

people-running-scared-clipart-1044249-Royalty-Free-RF-Clip-Art-Illustration-Of-A-Cartoon-Fearful-Man-RunningUnhappy people fill their thoughts with what could go wrong versus what might go right.

Unhappy people are usually deluded with doubts and allow themselves to daydream about what they’d like to have life unfold for them but are always disappointed things didn’t go as planned.

Unhappy people fill their souls with constant worry and fear.

Happy people experience fear and worry, but make an important distinction between feeling it and living it.  When fear or worry crosses a happy person’s mind, they’ll ask themselves what choices they can make to rise up over their adverse circumstances and how they can fight the good fight of faith to prevent their fear or worry from happening (there’s responsibility again) and they take it.  If not, they realize they’re rooted in fear and they lay it down.

 

7. You fill your conversations with comparisons and complaints.

lonelyUnhappy people like to live in the past.  What’s happened to them and life’s hardships are their conversation of choice.  They are sometimes so stuck in their past pain they just can’t get to a place of letting go.  It actually becomes their identity and like an old friend (foe?) to stay in the pain.  And sometimes when they run out of things to say, they’ll turn to other people’s lives and compare.

Happy people live in the now and dream about the future.  You can feel their positive vibe from across the room.  They’re excited about something they’re working on, grateful for what they have and dreaming about the possibilities of life and what wonderful things the Lord has for them in the future.

Obviously none of us are perfect.  We’re all going to swim in negative waters once in a while, but what matters is how long we stay there and how quickly we work to get ourselves out.  Practicing positive habits daily is what sets happy people apart from unhappy people.

dixie1If you need help in identifying the tools to help you become a happy person, Life Coaching can help tremendously.  But again, it is a choice.  Just read some success stories on my web site: http://www.reflectionsofgracehome.com/#!success-stories/c24vq to see how God’s perspective has helped countless others to make this transition from unhappiness to being happy!

Queenism photo posted by permission from http://QueenofYourOwnLife.com/

Hello, Fear. I’ve Been Expecting You…Five Tools to Combat Anxiety

dixie1My journey over the past two years has been one of disbelief, then shock, then denial, then fear, then acceptance, and finally, faith.

But maybe that is wrong. 

Faith had to always be there or I wouldn’t be sane right now.  I have watched God sustain us on very little work for my husband for at least the last 2 years and before that we slowly watched our work source disappear due to California’s changes and cutbacks.  We literally live with no savings and only Him to provide for us.

(You can read about this journey in my new book, 50 Ways to Meet Your Lover, in the “Warfare” section of the book.)

Manna from Heaven.

Well, not literally Manna…yet.   

But envelopes on the door step.  Acquaintances walking up and handing us money.  The givers, giving as my husband speaks at various church gatherings.  And my own income from coaching keeps me floating.  It is so supernatural I can’t even tell you where it all comes from.   

My journey as a Life Purpose Coach is amazing too.  God seriously brings in the clients and it has been this way since the beginning of this career.  When my clientele gets low, I pray and ask God for more and He sends them.

All you have to do is let God know you are ready to reach out to people and He will send them.  No stress in that one.  He just sends them.  So, be watching or you will miss the opportunity.

thumb_colourbox1908348What one usually fears, at the root level, is a kind of death. We fear a death of a part of ourselves, the death of a job, the death of a move, death of an income, death of ourselves….and the list goes on.  When we think of certain big transitional periods in our lives, we often experience a lot of change.  Change invokes the death of something in our minds…the ending of something.

A change usually requires some letting go of old thoughts, behaviors, people, situations, and ways of being.  And then we can experience the new and fresh.  But if we let anxiety take over we become paralyzed and defeated.

The truth is that we won’t actually die, but somewhere within our psyche, we feel as though we are LITERALLY going to die.

Once we get past that initial fear and insert a healthy comforting tool, we can move towards the new.  We must, in turn, accept what we most fear.  You have to ask yourself…what is the worst that can happen?  

And within that answer comes reality.  I won’t die!

Here are 5 tools for you to begin to gain ground in this fight against fear.

1.  Admit to yourself that you are experiencing anxiety because if you deny it…it only gets worse.  Face it head on.  Make a decision to not react to it.  Instead focus on deep breathing.  Focus only on the breathing and Jesus.  Picture Him right beside you and breathe in His all encompassing peace, and breathe out the anxiety and fear.  Make sure the breaths are from your diaphragm and not your chest in shallow puffs.  Take a deep full breath in through your nose, making sure your belly expands on the inhale, and out through your mouth, and the belly contracts.

2.  Listen to sweet worship music and focus on the words. Drown out the fearful thoughts.

3.  Whisper the name of Jesus…the bible says that at the mention of that name, every knee has to bow, in heaven and in earth….this means that when you say His name, the enemy of fear can’t stay around…it has to leave…

…fear and perfect Love cannot dwell together.

 4.  Learn to train your mind to be on guard against the thoughts that come from–THE VOICE–and that voice usually comes from our enemy or just our own minds (and past voices that spoke negativity into our lives) where the enemy has planted his imagery of death.

 5.  When you feel the thoughts coming of impending doom, immediately start the breathing, the name of Jesus, and a favorite verse you can say over and over again.  And if you need it, put on that music!

Shoulder-Angel-and-DevilTwo thoughts cannot dwell in your mind at the same time.  One or the other has to go.  I choose to eradicate the fear thought.

Trust that, no matter what, within your new heart lies the ability to get through anything.  Trust Him–He will walk you through it.

So, that is how I have gotten through this death of the old in my life.  I still don’t know what the outcome of all this will be.  But I do know Jesus has a plan and it will unfold when He is ready to show it to me. 

Meanwhile, I can’t afford to let my mind wander into the unknown valley of fear for it will lead to a certain death of my peace.

426__550x413_jesus-and-peter-walking_on_waterThis is a battle with the principalities and powers of the air, the warfare for my life and the fight is not mine but His.  As long as I envelope myself in Him He will not let me sink into that raging sea.  

It is not complicated though we try to make it so, don’t we?  

There is no formula, no works, no traditions, nothing that we can fall back on that will move us out of anxiety and into the peace that passes all understanding…except His love.

He is Love itself, and He promises that He will NOT ever forsake us.  

….for He [God] Himself has said, I will not in any way fail you nor give you up nor leave you without support. [I will] not,  [I will] not, [I will] not in any degree leave you helpless nor forsake nor let [you] down (relax My hold on you)! [Assuredly not!]  Hebrews 13:5b Amp.

I will announce the winners of the free books on my next blog.  Read the last blog about the release of my newest book, 50 Ways to Meet Your Lover, and comment if you want to enter the drawing!

 

When Feelings Lose Their Power

 

 

waterfall I lost life as I knew it over the course of one year a while back. Of course it was a slow build up to that year, but denial has a funny way of making you blind to what is coming.

(The complete story of this trip into the wasteland of my soul is recorded in my last book, Climbing Out of the Box.)

Through years of denial, spiritual abuse, and unresolved childhood abuse issues, my life broke apart in huge chunks and floated away on a sea of despair.  I lost my marriage, my home, myself, my church, and my children moved out…and did I mention I lost myself?

…all within a few months of each other.

Then I entered the wasteland of devastation and loss and an overload of “feelings”.

How can I describe the feelings?

OLYMPUS DIGITAL CAMERAIt was like being on a huge merry go round, holding on for dear life, trying to look like I had a grip but my vise gripped fingers were sliding off with every whirl.  It twirled faster and faster until my hands did lose their grip and I was flung off into space with magnitude force into nothingness with no idea where I would finally land.  When I did land I felt like I was smothering in feelings and couldn’t breathe; Kind of like being buried alive.

  • Grief

  • Despair

  • Fear

  • Anxiety

  • Sorrow

  • Emptiness

  • Anger

In the years that followed I was alone with myself and thought I would never recover from the empty shell that was me.

My feelings became my faithful companions until I finally started talking to God.  Boy did I have the questions.

The most fascinating thing to me was that He never left.  He stepped back, though, to give me time to come to the place of realizing all my answers were in Him.  He is always so patient with us.

As I called upon Him in my solitary place, He began to heal my frayed and broken heart.  I was ruled by my feelings at the point of quiet desperation and had been since the beginning of the dirge into blackness.

PeaceHe held me and let me weep when I finally pushed my arms up to my “Abba, Daddy”, in brokenness.

And then the healing began.  I learned so much in the next few years of exile.

One of the things I learned was that my feelings didn’t have to rule me or dictate to me how to act for the rest of my life.

When we call upon Him in our feelings of abandonment and reach deep into our still, quiet heart, where He dwells,

  • Our fears lose their power to control us;

  • Our “out of control” anger loses its power to devastate anyone lying in its wake….and

  • Our depression loses its power to consume us.

Our feelings lose their control over us.

That still, quiet center of us, where He resides, is where we are aware of His presence the most.  Learn how to quiet yourself and find that spot of uninterruption and you will find His voice.

  • He centers us.

  • He is our anchor.

When we call upon Him, we find the power to let go of our resentment and ask for forgiveness.  We can also forgive ourselves and be free.  We can let go of the past and move into the stillness of living large in the here and now.

And then we learn to trade in our profound shame for vulnerability with others, for in Him we are safe; and we trade in our fear of being embarrassed, to finally being transparent.

Our feelings provide the fertile ground of captivity for us.

If we listen to them they will kill our creativity that God wants to use.  They will squelch our love for others and undermine our knowledge of redemption and grace.

What if we just decided to stop listening to our feelings, and started listening to what God says about us; and start focusing in on His still whispers of direction and love?  What if we make a conscious decision to believe we are really hearing His voice and just do it…by faith?

And accepting our feelings as real, for they are very real, but not necessarily true if they become our dictating force and despair.  They can betray us in portraying Gods words as not trust worthy.

It is like a drop of soothing, healing water to accept that our feelings are real, but can be deceptive outside of God’s truth about us.

1510543_680314828697735_1831250127_nI think our shame would dry up and our love would explode and the world would never be the same  again if we can get to this place of truth and freedom.

The Sea of Me….A Story of Gratitude

raging-seaI have come to know you, my audience, as my friends.  I have allowed myself to share my heart with you in my most intimate places.  For I know that true transparencies bring true continued healing and restoration in not only myself but in you.

 

So, today, I just want to share a heart of thanksgiving with you that sometimes is hard to contain.  As you know I am a Life Purpose Coach.  But I do not write this as a ploy to get more clients.  I write this out of a desire to share the wonderful joy that I have overflowing in my heart at changed lives.

Because of the confidentiality and bonding that happens in such a transparent relationship of Life Coaching, you don’t get to share details of the glorious work of God that often.  Life purpose coaching is a time of traveling for a while with someone on their journey, allowing Holy Spirit to bring those things out that need to be healed or exposed so the person can move forward unstuck; into God’s perfect plan for them.

 I get to assist the Holy Spirit while He changes lives!! 

  

I always explain to my clients that I am just the person running alongside them on the sidelines; doing cart wheels, waving flags, and shouting “You can do this.” But they are the ones who actually do the work.  Can you see the picture?

 Cartwheel

Coaching is what YOU make it.   When you make the decision to sign up for coaching, you are ready for finally letting go of your own ways and surrendering to God and allowing Him to open doors you never even imagined or walked in before.  It is a wonderful and amazing thing to do for yourself.  When someone is ready for Life Coaching, they are ready for God to do a new thing and discover answers to questions they may have had their whole life.

Life coaching guides you into clarity and fulfillment in your life by discovering what you were always meant to do through examining your life’s experiences, good and bad. Coaching will help you if you are blocked, stuck, or blinded by circumstances, yet are committed to moving forward responsibly.  

 

I always tell my clients that you can’t take one step towards God that He doesn’t take 5 towards you.

 

Almost from the first day with someone I get to see changes in them that absolutely thrill my soul.  I feel like I get an inside seat to watch the heart of God at work.  What a privilege!!

It has been an absolute joy to get to assist the Holy Spirit while He changes the lives of those willing to take that step of faith.   Week after week, after appointments, the minute I hang up the phone or close the door, I get to dance with Jesus in excitement over the joy in faces that show new awakening, and for new life emerging from the past in all of its complexities.   I watch giftings and talents uncovered, new adventures beginning, freedom from old strongholds and generational patterns, a new awareness that Jesus is a very real lover of their souls, and a newfound love of His constant companionship.

jesus and me

 I get to do this!!   

 

I praise Him with all my heart for choosing me to get to walk hundreds of journeys with His children and to have a first row seat to watch it all unfold in His perfectness.  

Many times I have wished I could just share everything I have experienced with everyone I meet because I get so excited at the awesomeness of what He does in personal lives.  He and I rejoice together and I feel Him smile at me when I get so excited and He is the only one I can tell everything to.

It humbles me beyond words.   For so many years I felt like God used everyone but me.   I always felt like an imposter.  It took a while (my whole life to this point, actually), for Him to bring me around to see my own gifts and callings.  It took many more years of pain and healing to finally get to this point of finding what He was preparing me for all along.

I have been through many horrible years of childhood incest, spiritual abuse, divorce, my own child being molested, poverty mentality, extreme loss, wrongful thinking, and 5 years in the desert to finally find who I really am.  I guess that is why I know that He is no respecter of persons and all it takes is a willing heart and sometimes someone to guide us into the right path.  His desire is to bring us all to that place of knowing we are walking in His will.

Learning to trust Him in what He has called me to do; I can now see how all of my trials led me to this place.  He knows what to do with us and what we need to open our eyes to His reality and not our own.  

Joy and excitement jumps within me each and every time someone I have been assigned to have their eyes opened to how deeply and completely they are loved by Jesus and as I watch a deep relationship formed between the two of them, I marvel at His goodness.

Sometimes a client is so excited in their new found freedom they desire to share it with the world.

So, I want to introduce Donna, a client I am actually still working with but she has given me permission and says she would be honored if I would share her story in a recent poem she wrote.   She recently shared this poem at a convention, and when she was done the tears flowed freely among herself and many attending, as they could relate to her story of pain and then hope.   There is so much I would like to say about Donna, but I am always mindful that it can only be shared in all of its completeness by her. 

 

It is her story.   

 

The Sea of Me  thumb_COLOURBOX1908348

By Donna Hines, through our Lord

 

One day I decided to go down to the sea,

To see if I could find the part that was missing of me.

 

I went down to the cliff and gazed off the rocky shore,

I could not visualize me. I couldn’t see me anymore.

 

It was gone, that part that held my dreams,

It slipped beneath the surface where shadow and light mimic moonbeams.

 

Dark waves crashed overhead causing ripples of fear,

It dissected my soul and caused me to disappear.

 

I was lost like Peter, but beneath the sea,

Dark, quiet motions as I screamed silently.

 

Where was God, where was Jesus, where was Holy Spirit,

Was that me gasping and who was there to hear it?

 

Thrashing, turning, convoluting my form;

Struggling for control in my personal storm.

 

I had to let go and stop the struggle,

I had to give up; I had no more air bubbles.

 

It was then that I knew I had no answers,

I was a puppet with the minuet dancers.

 

I thought that I could direct my life,

And found out instead I only directed the strife.

 

Jesus is the beautiful lover of my soul,

He gathers my pieces, He makes me whole.

 

He gives me a path, a direction to take,

What ocean I swim in is not His mistake.

 

Arm over arm I delight in the waves,

It is beautiful Jesus I rest in, it is Him who saves.

 

Awesome God, O Great I Am, you are where I find that missing part of me.

I am deeply loved, have always been cherished, never chained and unequivocally free!

 

 

Donna is sharing almost daily with me all the wonderful things that are transpiring in her life right now, as God has been revealing her gifts to her;  Gifts that were always there, but buried beneath years of struggle and pain.

Can we not all relate to this poem? 

 

Our answers lie in Jesus, always!!   It doesn’t matter what the issue is when a client comes to me.  It always goes back to filling the gaping hole within their hearts with Jesus.

 

He will move you into His perfect plan for your life as well.  Can you imagine finding complete fulfillment in what God has called you to do?  Seek Him for His plan for you, if you don’t know what it is yet.

 

For it was for relationship with Him that we were created.

Three Keys to Recognize “Mistaken Thinking”

72502_464513973611156_2101516539_nAs a young believer coming into a new group of believers I was so shy.   I kept to myself though I longed to join other young couples and make friends.  I would watch them gather together and keep myself apart from them because I felt so inferior.  I had nothing to offer them, I thought.  I just have to look good and they will think I am together.   It didn’t work.  I mistakenly thought they didn’t like me.  This was because I always believed I was flawed because I was abused as a child.  Then one day one of the young mothers told me that she would like to be my friend but that I was giving off the persona that I was better than them.  What?   All the time I was dying to make friends, they thought I was snooty because of my little act of sufficiency.    This was eye opening to me.   I decided that no matter how I felt on the inside I would “put on” who I wanted to be.   I started going up to people and act very friendly and welcome them to church, as if I was the director of customer service.  I would stand in the foyer and greet people as if I was appointed the job, which I wasn’t.   People started lighting up when they would see me and I made many friends.    I found out from many of them that they were afraid to approach me.

CartwheelYears later I found myself working frantically for God  to be more acceptable to Him.   I became addicted t o “ministry” to cover my own lack of self esteem.   I had learned to paint the picture of being a worthy person very well.  The busier I became in helping people the more accolades of praise and admiration they would lavish me with.  Their words filled the deep holes in my soul that I so needed to feel important—temporarily, just as any addiction does.  I didn’t understand Grace.  I didn’t really know Jesus intimately.  Oh, I knew He had redeemed me and I was going to Heaven.  But I didn’t know He loved me exactly as I am and wanted to fill those deep holes with only Him.     I was slowly sinking into a loss I was not prepared for.

Pharisee  I was caught up in legalism.   I thought if I worked hard enough God would find me acceptable.  Where did that come from?   Was it correct thinking?   I appeared righteous and spiritual, but inside I was ultimately failing to accomplish God’s purposes because my life was based on outward performance instead of inward change.  Being a victim of incest at an early age I always thought that I was less than everyone else.   I was miserable around people because I just knew they could see my flaws, thus, the constant working to prove myself worthy.

Quite often, from earliest childhood mostly, we are taught something born out of someone else’s insecurity, prejudice, ignorance, or our very own victimizations.  These things form the way we think about ourselves.  It is amazing how we can go a lifetime believing lies and living them as truth, based only on our past injuries.

Shoulder-Angel-and-Devil    Mistaken thinking can interfere with the plan God has for you on this earth.  It can keep you down.  It can keep you stuck in a strong hold that will blind you to God’s plan for you.  We need to unlearn the things we have believed all of our lives in order to get unstuck in areas we just can’t seem to move forward in.

What are some areas you have mistakenly believed and walked in most of your life, or maybe, all of your life?   Here are some examples:

  • I am unworthy of love.

  • God loves me only if I am productive.

  • I need to rescue people in order for them to like me.

  • I am an island.

  • Manipulation works.

  • Don’t trust anyone.

  • I can’t.

  • I am a victim for the rest of my life.

  • Never give up control.

  • People are cruel

  • Self esteem is based on good looks, riches, popularity, or power.

  • I have to be perfect.

  • I can fix people.

  • I must always play it safe.

God desires for you to know who you really are, and realize how deeply He loves, accepts, and appreciates you, so that you can live out the fullness of what all He has ordained you to be. God’s Word tells us that without being rooted and grounded in the love (and acceptance) of God, we cannot experience the fullness of God in our lives.

 

golden-keyASK THE HOLY SPIRIT TO REVEAL TO YOU THE AREAS OF MISTAKEN THINKING THAT IS NOT OF GOD.

You will be amazed when you ask God to do this and be willing from the heart to listen to Him how quickly he will show you where your thinking is off.

golden-keyIN WHATEVER AREA YOU KNOW YOUR THINKING IS OFF, SEARCH THE WORD FOR WHAT GOD SAYS ABOUT YOU AND HOW VALUED YOU REALLY ARE.  MEMORIZE IT AND WHEN YOU GO BACK TO YOUR OLD WAY OF THINKING, IMMEDIATELY PULL OUT YOUR TRUTH INSTEAD!

 Begin to say those scriptures whenever you are tempted to think in your old ways.    For instance, in thinking you are an island unto yourself and the only one you need in life.  The word says to not forsake the gathering of believers together for we need each other.  It is when we isolate that the enemy comes in to deceive us.  We were created for community, not isolation.  We need each other!

golden-keyDEVELOP YOUR INTIMACY WITH A VERY REAL, PERSONABLE JESUS! 

We are who we spend the most time with.  When you really know Jesus in every sense of the word, you become more like Him.  You begin to think like Him!!  Your old misconceptions will change.

PS:  Life Coaching can help you identify your areas of mistaken thinking and transform those areas into “right” thinking, breaking old patterns of defeat.   You might give it a try!     http://www.reflectionsofgracehome.com/lifecoaching.html